Lakshmi

Happy Diwali!
I got up this morning and cleaned the house, swepted the air with a cinnamon broom. I am well prepared to recieve prosperity. Louise Hay says you can have as much prosperity as you are willing to recieve.
Diwali, being The Festival of Lights, I made a row of candles and put on Pandora "Bollywood Baby" station. I thought of how grateful that I am the God, The Holy Spirit, Jesus, Budha....the Holy forces of the universe (by whatever title our culture chooses to place on our Creator) came through to delivery me a beautiful little grandbaby boy.
There was a day when I was so full of anxiety, waiting for Joelle to go into labor. It meant everything in the whole world to me to be there when she had the baby. And well, people at work were speaking against the positive energy and saying that Joelle would not have the baby while I was there....that I should have waited. It was reported to me that every morning in morning meeting someone spoke against me. Mocking me as if wishing that I would not be there when the grandbaby arrived. I wanted to be there for Joelle as much as I wanted to be part of this awesome moment.
One day as I was praying for peace and that this anxiety would leave me, I felt compelled to go into Joelle's room and just grab one card off her deck. I did. The card read "Stop worrying. Everything is going to be fine." It was LAKSHMI on the card. Wow...I was in awe and felt reassurd that I did the right thing to travel there and be there with Joelle prior to her delivery.
Well, the hours past, the days past...and the little baby was in no hurry to come out. I kept Lakshmi card hung up in the kitchen in my view to remind myself. ...STOP WORRYING! After 9 days of waiting and trying to suppress the anxiety.... I couldn't take it anymore and I went crazy, hopeless with a freak out session. I took Lakshmi and ripped the card up. It was not true. Things were not going to be alright....things looked worse then ever. I cried most of the night, so upset. Why would God mislead me, when I felt so certain that I was suppose to fly to Montana when I did? Welllll..... needless to say. Everything was alright. Joelle started serious labor the next morning and by the afternoon beautiful Jude was here gracing us with his presence. I felt like a fool. If I could have just held out one more day, I could have avoided a freak out session. Now I know, just hang on for one more day. You don't know what is just up ahead around the corner, what the next dawn will bring.... I believe it's something as beautiful as Jude. So just hold out on the panic attacks!!! Wait for it...wait for it. Blessings are surely coming.
I have so much more to say and so little time... off to work I go. But I dressed up and adorned myself with lots of jewelry in admiration for God and a Goddess who make everything alright.
By the way, I keep a card in view.... all taped up.... It is Laksmi "Bright Future". Regardless of the damage of done in my past, it taped up, patched up, put back together for bright future.
Silah.