From Evil to Auspicious

The following is a letter I wrote to my meditation teacher. He shared with me last week that while he was meditating with me in mind, he felt a sensation on his right hand, outer palm. According to Sahaja meditation that spot on the body represents 'evil'. He felt to tell me of this and how to meditated to rid myself of whatever the cause of it was. The following is my response to this. Note, foot soaking is what we do during Sahaja mediatation.



HI Nitin,

I pondered and practice meditation focused on ridding evil. I went through many thoughts....blaming others who I hung with for attaching evil to me. Being the "head case" that I am I had to study up on the all the definitions of evil. I felt dirty, like I have let the evil D-evil attach himself to me. (Which has been a part of my Christian upbringing, but in recent years, I pretty much doubt the existence of such a being).
I was pondering the evil and the thought came to me: 'Act like you’re slamming a door.' So I did. And I realized, I am right handed, and the force of pressure that I would use to slam a door is ....right on the part of my outer palm where you showed me that evil resides. So I made that connection that I need to slam the door on evil. Step one.
I have been listening to Eckhart Tolle's "The Power of Now". His book has been teaching me a lot of about Self-realization and God-realization. I came to realize that evil attachment had to do with decisions that I have been making- not necessary intentional, but just out of unawareness....and definitely out of big old ego. Interesting, I was very hung up on the word 'evil' and Tolle discusses not to get caught up on words themselves. Call it whatever name you want, but realize it is a principle that you need to come to terms with...by whatever label one places on it.
With Valentine's Day tomorrow....the whole celebration of love thing, I realized I wanted to clear myself of wronging myself and to make decision for my well- being.
Instead of doing a foot soak tonight, I did a whole body soak in the bathtub. I practiced meditation in the bathtub. Then I took a shower to cleanse and rinse. I spent much time letting the shower spray on my right outer palm. It was a good symbolic cleansing for me. Many people were brought to mind that I had hurt with my selfishness (‘evil’) decisions.
I've also faced that fact that for the most part, the negativity at work and in life in general, that I want to get away from is the negativity within me: that I am drawing it to me because of the sum total of what I have created in my life to this point.
Some years back I made a very selfish decision that hurt people that I love dearly, including myself. I have learned from Tolle that I have been unconsciously bringing bad back to myself. The truth and realization almost LITERALLY hit me over the head with it this week. What a wake call, that I have to stop these wrong (evil) choices.
On occasion, I smear my head with coconut oil since it is good for hair. I realized tonight that it was a part of my cleansing ritual...I was ANNOITING my head with oil-just as I am familiar with in my Christian faith. Interesting, I decided to research to see if anointing is part of Hindu faith. Yes, I found the following:
"In the Hindu belief systems anointment is freely practiced. To mark particular devotions, as a "consecration" to particular beliefs or as a ritualized blessing used especially to invoke auspicious beginnings,...Anointing is also used to aid persons within negative cycles—"
I love that word auspicious. I believe that tonight the negative cycles are broke out of my life and an auspicious life is “NOW”. I was going to say auspicious future. But I'm pulling out of the past and not pushing so hard into the future. I am balanced NOW.
Interesting, you know how one sleep's wrong and gets a stiff neck. I have had a stiffness in my right shoulder and I feel the soreness when I push my shoulder forward. I thought this strange, since I never had such a soreness before. I realized that I have been putting alot of pressure on myself about the upcoming months. ...all these big changes that I have to make happen. My body is trying to tell me to let off on the anxiety about it.
I wanted to share my thoughts with you and let you know that I took to heart what you revealed to me. I have experienced some self-realization. Thank you for pointing me in the right direction.
See you Wednesday,
Roselle

Helllo Ladies,
I don't feel like I have anything particularly inspiring to write about, but I wanted to check in. I have been dilignt to exercise with 10 minutes a day dedicated to each of us. Often I exercise for longer than a half an hour.
What's going on in my life now: I am really enjoying Budhist meditation on Monday nights and Wednesday nights I learn Sahaja yoga mediation. I am learning more and more how God is one God in all of us, no matter what religion we label ourselves. Not that anyone it teaching me that, but pieces to my overall understanding are popping into place, like missing puzzle pieces. In my meditations I have been pondering how I can take part in these foriegn religion practices, as they do serve a great benefit to me, yet I did't want to disown Christianity. I was pondering the concepts of how these practices are so much like Christian practices, but just differet names on them. I stayed after in Sahaja class. The conversation went very deep as I happened to mention that I have Lakshmi and Ganesh included in my self-realization practices. The instructor was surprised... being of India nationality, he doesn't speak much of the Hindu gods as we Amerians are no so receptive. As we talked further that he explained that there are different points on our bodies that represents all the different entities of all the different faiths... Jesus is located right in the middle of the forehead, Lakshmi in the middle of stomach. I could go on on, but I am expressing that I am at realizing more that God is Universal, and all that universal power dwells within me, in my spirit. I do have the power to be the Master of my own destiny. I do have the power to create my future and to live in the NOW in a spectacular way. All is well in my world. All is well within me. Selah

I know how to get back up

What did I create in January?
My January was focused on Confidence. I think I built a tittle-bit of self-esteem. But I wish I would've done more. This next month I'm taking a cue from mom and going to start meditating or focusing my mind each morning. So that my days are more intentional. Some of the things I did this month that helped me with my confidence level are... I read through that Joyce Meyer magazine. She had some wonderful things to say that meant a lot to me. Also I stole your affirmation mom... "i look good i feel great i weight 199 pounds" I would chant this well walking to work a lot of times. I took time for my outward appearance. Even doing something as keeping my nails looking nice has really helped make me feel special. And last but not least, i got a boyfriend. I know confidence is suppose to be all about your self and loving yourself. But having a boyfriend makes a girl really feel good. Plus I think that is what helps contribute to my beauty regimen. Another thing I did this month for the betterment of myself was when i got back to work i started making wiser food choices, limiting sugar, and portion sizes. I eat more often but less at a time.

I'm really excited for this month. INSPIRATION. That's what it's all about.
What will I do to achieve my goals in February?
I will read an inspirational story. Not just about weight loss but all forms.
Each day I will take time to read a story and think about it and ask God if there is anything for me to specifically get from it.
I will start keeping a journal with me. Inspiration can strike anywhere anytime from anyone or anything.
Meditate on who I am in Christ. I have a little pamphlet that lists all the verses about what and who God says I am. And I think its due time that my mindset about myself starts to line up with my creator.

Thought that I had today...
Road blocks have a diving purpose...They make you stronger! If everything in life was all sunshine and daisies everyone would be complacent. Why work for anything if everything in my life is just okay.
Also it's God's way of saying "not here, not now". Remember He plants you your dreams and desires within you and will bring them into fruition in HIS TIME. They may not always look the way you expected but they are better then you could ever dream or imagine.

Now for today's inspirational moment...

Today i was inspired by...
Eating mindfully! Mom you're blog post really got me thinking.

Inspiration in Action...
During all my meals today I ate slowly, took smaller bites, and chewed a lot. It made me realize how much i normally just scarf down my food after like 3 bites. I also made notice of all of the foods sight, smell, touch, taste, and sound. It was a really neat thing to do. I also found that I ate wayyyyy less food. Partially bc when your so aware you realize when your full faster. But also bc i would have to run back from break.

Well thats that. Have a great night! Love ya!

Another New Beginning

Happy new month of our new year of The Power of Three! I feel a great sense of accomplishment. I practiced most of what was on my vision page for January. I missed a few things. But I'm okay and I'm on my way.
January's focus for me was "Creating" - to bring into being. To cause to exist.
What I did not accomplish *create* is:
SparkPeople. I did (re)sign up but haven't made use of the site.
I didn't get music downloaded on to an ipod for working out. I did make wonderful use of Pandora for working out and had some really fun workouts.. plus I started using peaceful music to play as 'white noise' in my office. It has made a relaxing difference.
I didn't write near as much as I would have liked to. I did write down a memorable dream and some really good flash cards that I use during meditation.
My quote on my vision page was "Remember to write, write to remember." And you know what....writing those cards has been a great help. It does help me to remember to command great things for my life. They remind me of who I am and what I can have.
I did not read a book from cover to cover as I had intended. But I chewed on several different books that brought me great insight and comfort. Books included: Be here Now. The One Command. The Three Keys to Self-Empowerment. These are all basically cookbooks for self-empowerment. Not meant to be whizzed through cover to cover.

So girls, this is a fresh start! Let's focus on what we DID accomplish in January! ..not what we didn't accomplish. Please do tell what you did accomplish/create in your lives in January.
What I created was....
I went from 122pds to 208.6.
I did go to the gym everyday before or after work.
I meditated every morning. I took up meditation class on Mondays and Wednesdays. -Two different types.
I kicked the diet soda habit. I believe I had a total of 5 cans since I started, rather than 3 a day.
I did some mindful eating where I only focused on my food. The sight, smell, taste, feel and how it sounds. By using all my senses I was satified more with less food. ohhh, that is a wonderful concept that I am learning more about...being satisfied more with less-not just food. I am satisfied more with less just by being mindful of what is around me. I am a witness to life at the moment and it does bring joy and peace instantly.
I did drink green. I drank chlorophyl water every morning.
I did text Treven...almost every day.....AND he texted me back!!!!!!One small step for mother/son relationship.....one giant hug for my heart.
What was the best thing about January 2012? It is that I feel closer to my daughters. We have grown closer as women and friends. Relationship- That is the heart and soul of a beautiful life. And I thank you for the influence that you have had on me to be a better person, to be a stronger woman. You both have contributed to that.
Joelle, you are a great example of the power of inner peace no matter how tumultuous the wind or rain is around you.
Shanna, you are the epidomony of strength within yourself. You do not grovel with a man if it goes against the peace within you. That is strength. You set an example for me when you were willing to forfiet New York City so that I would not grovel with David.
grov·el (grvl, grv-)
1. To behave in a servile or demeaning manner; cringe.
2. To lie or creep in a prostrate position, as in subservience or humility.
3. To give oneself over to base pleasures: "Have we not groveled here long enough, eating and drinking like mere brutes?" (Walt Whitman).
Shanna and you proved yourself again with Brandon.
Both of my beautiful daughters have amazing strenth. I need you both in my life. It makes me a better person just having your influence.
In the words of Miley...I'm still good. We are still good! We are still the Power of Three!
Now...Turn the page. Time for a new beginning. This month my focus word is IMAGINE.
There is a quote on my page:
"Go confidently in the direction of your deams. Live the life you have imagined."
Every DAY is a new beginning to create what you imagine.
So creating Woman..Creative Power of Three....What shall it be?
What do you so desire to create today?
Imagine it, speak it....and so it shall be. You shall make it exist!
Selah Selah Selah Selah Selah Selah Selah